Underrated Hottie of the Week Part 2

12 11 2012

Mystery Samsung Mom

Even though Barstool dropped a post on how hot this chick is literally minutes ago, I don give a FwUCK. The mime had this bad boy in the underrated hottie hopper yesterday, unfortunately Paula Broadwell took precedence this morning. So don’t hit the send button on that h8 mail quite yet, the mime aint plagiarizing.

With that said, you can bet your bottom dollar I dropped a hefty nut the first time I saw this commercial. Completely out of left field. Oh great, another cutesie cell phone commercial…Daddy, I made you a video for your flight! Sitting there figuring it’s another heart warming commercial, the guy’s a family man yadda yadda, Lumineers song, boring. Think again, JD, think again and maybe pull your dong out because this commercial’s about to take a sharp left into steamy-ville. Spoiler alert, the dudes sexy wife tosses him an HD diddle sesh vid for his long and lonesome business trip. At first I’m thinking nah, I heard that wrong. My mind is always in the gutter, probably just zoned out and fantasized the entire thing. Watched it 24 more times again. Nope. It’s for real. This is actually a nationally televised commercial that includes an inferred reference to homemade porn. Bravo Samsung. I need to get my hands on a Galaxy S III immediately in the off chance this woman lives in Milwaukee and recently divorced Joaquin Phoenix.

But let’s talk more about how sexy this mystery woman is. Right in the wheelhouse for ideal dream woman. Exactly how coach drew it up.

Hair to the side, cardigan on like she either just got done finger painting with the kiddos or finger blasting with a dildo, which one is it? We don’t know and that’s half the fun. Clearly not very much into planning OR really into surprises, surprises of the nudie vid variety. Maybe both? Either way I’m not much of a planner either, so we’re already perfect for each other. I don’t know much about how the Galaxy S III works but it looks to me like she had both those videos in the same folder on her phone? No biggie, here’s our daughter doing some ballet, then here’s me dropping it down a cucumber for 20 minutes. Two kids yet she’s still keeping it tight and keeping it right. She’s hot but not super-duper insane hot, so average dudes like me instantly feel like there’s an off chance I have a shot with her. Not trying to write a post about everything I want in a woman, but at the same time I think I basically just did?

Hopefully some internet nerds find out who this actress is ASAP because there are literally no pictures or any info on her anywhere. Trust me, I looked.

Congrats to mystery Samsung mom on the underrated hottie nod, it’s well deserved.

– JD



One response

17 12 2012

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