Underrated Hottie of the Week: Double Feature

1 10 2012

Surprisingly, our weekly UH postings are some of our most popular and by some of the most I mean hands down, no question the most. Weird that people would rather check out a pair of premium boobies than read a premium article on Big Hurt Beer. Sometimes the human race baffles me.

Well lately I’ve been getting a bunch of suggestions for who to nominate as this weeks Underrated babe. With the massive number of requests, we can only use a select few. Sorry folks, that’s just how it works. Shout out to M. Mike Shyama-long and K-bone for the good lookin out.

Be sure you’ve got an excel spreadsheet on deck in case your boss comes by and you’re browsing this post, then tape your wang to the side of your leg and get ready for an unprecedented two part UH. Both of today’s gals have pornstar-sounding names but sadly, neither dabble in adult entertainment.

First up to bat is a little known smoke house named Lindsey Duke.

On the left.

As my nephew, Lengthy Beard, put it eloquently, “this broad equals a billion boners”. Couldn’t have said it better m’self. And after further inspection, she might be the hottest chick on the entire planet. But who, you ask, is this chub inducing angel-princess-goddess-shedevil?

Well Ms. Duke was first featured on Busted Coverage in their ‘Girlfriends of NCAA Quarterbacks’ segment. She’s the long time HS sweetheart of UCF quarterback Blake Bortles. Didn’t know who Blake Bortles was until a second ago, but instantly I respect the hell out of him and at the same time I want to murder him with a Louisville slugger and steal his lady. How Lindsey isn’t a model is beyond me. She’s got what looks to be an equal-to-better rack than Kate Upton and her face is about a milli times hotter too. Someone get her in an SI Swimsuit edish already!

I mean sweet lord.

Quick fat spiderman pic to cool you off in between honeys

Aaand we’re right back into it.

Batting second, out of Bristol, CT, is an up-and-comer named Samantha Steele.

If Lindsey Duke is the hottest woman alive, then Sammie Steele might just be the cutest. She’s been a sideline reporter on a variety of cable networks, most recently the Longhorn Network and ESPNU. Recently referred to as Erin Andrew’s replacement, she can be found every Saturday morning throughout the fall working for College Gameday. GOOD CHOICE. I gotta give the fine people at ESPN a lot of credit as they continue to toss top notch talent in our face, forcing guys everywhere to take back “sideline reporters are pointless” statements.

Samantha Steele definitely seems like take-home-to-ma material but more along the lines of take home to ma, then take out back and have kinky tool shed sex on the snowblower material. Dimples for days.



Congrats to both gals featured on this fine Monday afternoon. Know you’ve made more mime compadre wieners tingle in an eight hour period than ever before. That’s certainly something to be proud of.

– JD




One response

19 12 2012
OW Part 2: Christian and Samantha Sittin’ In A Tree «

[…] edge of my seat reading their article. Sammy Steele has been a mime favorite for months since her underrated hottie debut back in October. Just cute-ing up my television all fall long. From her awkward interview with Nick Saban to […]

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