New Mime In The Mix

2 03 2012

Some of you may have heard a rumor or two swirling through the grape vine. Well those rumors are true. The Off Duty Mime decided to break free from the vicious choke hold of the Midwest. That’s right. Seems like a little East Coast overdose was just what the doc ordered. No joke there, I actually went to my family physician yesterday. Dude was like, “That whole AIDS cocktail you got going on is waaay beyond my expertise so I’m going to be of no help at all on that. I can, however, prescribe an overdose of the east coast variety to make your blog a little less shitty.”

Naturally I was like alright my immune system is failing like a mother but whatever, I’ll take any advice I can get these days. And wouldn’t ya know, later that day a long lost compadre, and blogging man-child, from Boston shows up at TODM headquarters all interested yet hesitant to write for us. So I begged for what seemed like days and he finally caved.

Green Eggs n Pink Ham from Beantown.

Quick Stat sheet on the newest Mime Member:

Height – 6′ 3″

Weight – 225 (including Timbos and gold chain[s])

Shoe Size – 18W (take note ladies)

Sit and Reach – 37 (sit-n-reach units)

40 yard dash – 4.3 seconds

Typing: words per minute – 167

Nickname – Human Thesaurus

Expertise – Rare fossils/bitches

Welcome aboard big homey.

-JD

PS – I don’t have AIDS. It was a slight exaggeration. Felt like this post needed some emotional investment on the readers part. I don’t know.

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